It’s funny that today’s prompt is craving. I’m craving control. I was supposed to be doing outreach in a different city tomorrow but I found out about an hour ago, it’s been cancelled. Now, I don’t get to go home earlier because that city is closer to my parents than where I live. I wanted to see my parents tomorrow as it’s going to be my birthday. I haven’t lived in the same city as my parents in almost 5 years. While we’ve always celebrated my birthday together on a different day, I was looking forward to celebrating with them on my actual birthday. I understand that this makes me sound like a brat but I don’t know what else to do. I’m sad. I gave into my cravings today. I broke down and had a coca-cola today. I’ve been doing so good about not having any. I haven’t had any in a month. I was proud of myself. Now, I’m more mad at myself for giving into my craving. I also bought a ton of fried food and ate it all.

If only, I had control over myself and my schedule…

I just want to yell, cry, and hug the floor as I fall asleep.